Have you had moments when you're looking at your old pals photos and ended up teary eyed and smiling at the same time because memories of your fun adventures flash back. It happens to me, many times. I miss my barkada! I don't know about you, but Friendship back home and here are like night and day, I miss the simple ways of Barkadahan. Yung tambay, jamming, kainan,adventure,kantahan,iyakan,inuman, trabaho at yung friendship na walang kompetisyon ( er..maybe there was but I was too young to even pay attention), walang chismis, yung you got each others back. I miss being like by everyone and it hurts to experienced not being like in a Free World. You think wala niyan dito coz you can be whatever, whoever you are in America, you can dress like shit and still call it Fashionable. Yeah, Someone actually didn't like me because I was, take note "Not Trendy enough! " sad face :-( oh yeah! pak na pak! tsk tsk!
Here, for some reason you can feel the competition amongst friends even without saying it. It's my personal view ha and Blog ko to, okey? You can't show up in your friends door here you have to call and set up an appointment then maybe she/he could squeeze you in to her busy schedule kasi naman America na to eh, lahat kumakayod. And if you have one, you're lucky. I've been here since 2005 and here are the lessons I learned about Friendship, I learned them the hard way, kung makaka relate ka good for you or you can stop reading right here....
1. Don't Judge- Kapag may bagong ipakikilala sa yo...wag mag inarte at sabihing "Di ko siya feel..." or
" Di jud nako na feel si _________!" kasi malay
mo in the end BFF kayo diba? really I've seen it happen. Si Friend A, said..." I think Miss B was just after
coming here in the US, her hubby is too old for her!" nah, tiwas na ...BFF na sila ni Miss B karun. Bilog
ang mundo ang Bestfriend mo ngayun pwedeng Enemy mo bukas and vice versa. This line is from me " Di ko siya feel kasi mukhang high maintenance!" ako may sabi niyan..I ended up liking her for being kalog and down to earth.
2. Be Neutral- Exactly,wala dapat kampihan pag nag away away...kasi naman pag naging okey na sila at
BFF na sila ulit...feeling left out ka.Then you will start to doubt your friendship,paranoid ang drama mo ngayon. Mabubwisit kalang sa Friend mo you'll end up bwisit sa dalawa kaya
Lesson dun..walang kampi kampi yaan mo na lang sila magbasagan ng mukha eh magiging okey din naman
sila in the end eh. Kasi nga bilog ang mundo "love mo ngayun hate mo bukas" weeh? me ganun? oo me ganun!
3. Social Media Fuzz- Social media can be fun but don't let it get to your brain and if you think it already is
taking most of your time "DEACTIVATE" take a break and set your priorities straight. If you start feeling
bad coz your former close Friend who used to actively like your post is not liking your post anymore come
on girl, baka busy lang. Kung active naman siya liking your other friends posts eh baka talagang di lang
niya feel ang mga posts mo...ayan na pag worry wart na ang drama mo sa FB eh break na muna ha! If your friends are not following you on twitter,IG,Tmbler, eh baka mabilis lang ang takbo mo they can't follow you or might be that they don't have one. Kaya tumigil ka ha! wag mag emote na wala sa lugar! If you asked a friend to go to a movie or have lunch with you and keep telling you she's busy...but you see her photos hanging out with other friends, get a clue okey! Hind ikaw ang apple of the eye niya ngayon...and go back to #1's lesson..Don't Judge! the wheels on the bus go round and round nga diba...who knows you'll be the apple of her/his eyes tomorrow! Bet you bottom dollar!
4. Listener lang ang drama, di Commentator okey unless Broadcaster ka- Kung labasan ka ng himutok ni friend A kay friend B...makinig, ilabas sa kabilang tenga,wag dibdibin at baka pati ikaw may himutok na ding pagkalakilaki kay friend B. Iwasan din mag comment kasi baka in the end it's your words against her/his. Importante maging listener lang...,most of the time your friend just need you to listen at kapag hiningi ang opinion mo saka mo ibigay per0 dahan dahan lang ha baka himatayin sa mga payo mo!
5. Jealousy eats you Alive! True! Don't let jealousy eat your friendship, or in any relationship. If your BFF is getting "buddy -buddy or super close na" with friend C- kalma ka lang! Because If she's your true BFF she won't make you feel left out, She will keep you close no matter what. She won't put you in a situation where you'll feel uncomfortable. And besides there's no ownership attached to friendship! so stop right there!
6. It's not meant to be- Di uukol,di bubukol...hmmm lalim! yup, If its meant to be it will happen. Nagkapantay kayo ng wave length eh. gets niyo isa't isa. But When your friendship ends and you don't know why..don't just blame it on the other person I'm sure you had your share of faults as well. Move on from that friendship if the reason why your friendship is on halt is unsure and no one seems to know why. Especially if you asked your friend if you two are okey and she said everything is cool and yet you feel the friendship is still slipping away.
7. Stick with Friends that humbles you down- There will always be someone you will consider as "Ate" as confidant, as BFF for real, someone you will get your inspiration, someone who will burst your bubbles pag malaki na ulo mo at dina sumasayad paa mo sa lupa. Someone whom you won't compete coz they are so ahead of you, they been there done that! Someone who will tell you the truth even if it will hurt you.
Friendship comes and go, like what I've said your BFF now could be your Frenemy tomorrow.
I'll end this blog entry with my favorite Friendship quote, Thanks for reading loves!
"A real friend is one who walks in when the rest of the world walks out."
